Sunday, October 12, 2008

The Offers You Missed: Oct 11th


59 offers gone, 441 remain...

Who wants to listen to an unreleased musical masterpeice?

Who wants to taxidermy an animal that was picked up off the road just today?

Who wants their feet to be coddled like newborn babies?

Who wants to shave a head?

Who wants to play the human piano?

Who wants to try and catch a series of increasingly unwieldy objects?

Who wants to witness a daring display of love and vulnerability?

Who wants to dig up grandpa's corpse?

Who wants to listen to 10 different versions of the greatest song ever written?

Who wants to be above the law? Choose to commit one of three different crimes. We'll never tell.

Who wants to watch 5 people receive their offers?

Who wants to sit and spin?

Who wants a ticket to the second act of a different show?

Who wants to leave here tonight convinced that they are pretty?

Who wants to be the funniest person in the room?

Who wants a 15-minute hug?

Who wants indoor fireworks?

Who wants to be born again?

Who wants to be gently supported as you learn to stand on your head?

Who wants a portrait of themselves at 80?

Who wants to guess who's wearing a fat suit? Get it right, and they'll strip it off before your eyes.

Who wants a pillow fight with a clean ending?

Who wants to be kissed in 15 different cultures?

Who wants to hear Joseph sing?

Who wants to use Grandfather's pogo stick?

Who wants to watch an identical concert played on three different types of accordians?

Who wants ghost stories beneath sheets?

Who wants their entire body to be covered in Post-It notes that say "I love you?"

Who wants to watch a real live birth?

Who wants to be fitted for stilts and paraded about as our new tall friend?

3 comments:

Tim said...

Vernid and I are very happy. And in the spirit of Taxidermy, this morning I started rebuilding the stage in my back yard, and found a live opossum. And the opossum it had eaten. Anyone need a (mostly) complete opossum skeleton? I don't think my casket experience in shalackadermy has prepared me yet for such a complex task.

Memory said...

I need that skeleton, por favor!

Please holla back, I'll come over & pick it up. ^_^

memory.harker@gmail.com

Tim said...

Rubber Rep - bringing people who have animal skeletons and people who want animal skeletons together.